A Tree by the River by James Dunn

Author:James Dunn [Dunn, James]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Blue Forge Press
Published: 2019-05-16T18:30:00+00:00

Chapter 6

I dreamed again of mail call back at base camp. I could hear the "pop-pop" of the Huey and the sounds of the soldiers’ feet as they ran to the landing zone.

The coming of the mailbag was always a time of high interest to the guys. I ran too, even though I knew that I would get a letter from Myrna.

I dreamed this dream so many times I knew how it would go. I knew I would get an envelope, to open it and read that Myrna was marrying a hippie.

The crazy part was that although I knew how it was going to go, I would keep hoping that this time I could make the dream end differently. And so I would stand around with all the other guys, and wait, and hope that there was no letter for me.

But there always was. And it never changed. It always had her childish handwriting with the little round circles above each "i" and the short and low crossings of each "t."

Each time it started the same way. "Dear Toby," it began. "I hope you are doing okay." I didn't need to read the rest, because I knew it was going to tell me that she was marrying a guy named Ted from Kent State.

Myrna even said in the letter that I would like this guy if I got to know him.

Fat chance! I always crumpled up the letter after she wrote that. But this time I willed myself to change the dream. So instead of burning the letter in the ashtray, I willed myself to see it folded and put it in my footlocker. And so I was able to change the dream.

For the first time I was actually a little glad that our engagement was over. And it helped me to become aware that I really wasn't sure I was the same guy she kissed goodbye at the airport. And I wasn't sure that I even knew her well enough to marry her. And this time, I actually smiled at the idea that I might like Ted. Hell, I probably would, if I ever met him. I would shake his hand and introduce myself, "I'm the guy from her hometown, her childhood sweetheart. Pleased to meet you."

I recalled that our letters had started out so passionate, so honest. But as the months passed, they got more polite, less revealing. After the fourth month neither of us really talked about our deepest thoughts or our daydreams.

So this time, in this dream, I blessed her and wished her well, and Ted too. For the first time I saw her as if we were two ships, each heading in a different direction, which just happened to share some space for a moment before they passed out of sight.

It was then that I realized that her last few letters weren't even signed with love, just her name at the bottom of the page.

I woke up in total darkness of the night, moved by a deep sense of peacefulness.

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